How Hopeless Is A Hopeless Romantic?

“Most people, if they had really learned to look into their own hearts, would know that they do want, and want acutely, something that cannot be had in this world. There are all sorts of things in this world that offer to give it to you, but they never quite keep their promise.”– C. S. Lewis

Hopeless romantics. One definition is one who still watches out for eternal love, but does not believe there is one designed for him for eternity. It is one who has lost hope in a love that is bound to be his and his alone; one who found joy in hearing of other people’s love stories but no longer believes that such a joyous love story can still beheld. This is possible because one can only give one’s heart so much. One experiences the pain of loss too many, and it could be enough reason to be hopeless. Even losing the one person you truly hoped for (either by nature or by inevitability) could be one reason enough to lose all hope and on special occasions, one’s sanity.

But is there no hope for hopeless romantics? Do hopeless romantics exist in the family of God? I submit to you, they do. But they need not be as hopeless as the connotation dictates. This is my definition.

It is undeniably true that many of our brothers who have been wanting to pursue a romantic relationship have been rejected many times by our own sisters, and many of our sisters who have been waiting for our brothers to pursue them have never even been approached. The desire for matrimony is stronger on a number of our siblings, and these awkward situations are what causes the hopelessness. We do believe in eternal love, for it is one of the promises we hold on to in this relationship with Christ, bu the awkward reality of desires unmet make it the hardest thing to believe that another person could be one with you. Besides, there is also the possibility of “single blessedness” for the rest of your life, right?

But why would the Lord put such a desire in your heart if it did not please Him? Yes, we do ask the Lord to take away certain feelings because we want to be sure that all we feel, think, and do comes from Him. But what if he does not take such a desire away? Of course, it is also a different issue when we have been so focused on marrying. But the issue at hand is this: what if deep down in your heart of hearts, the Lord does not take away your desire to have a ministry partner (for the men) and a leader to sweep you off in a beautiful waltz (for women)? Why would God put such a desire if all the Lord wanted you to feel was the pain of hoping on nothing? Is not our hope in Him? If God has placed that desire for you to be one with someone else and pro-create and serve Him for all eternity ’til Kingdom come, then there must be someone out there for you! If you already know that God is preparing you and pruning you while waiting, then who is to say that the other person is not being pruned and prepared as well? Unless the Lord clarified to you that he has Him and Him only in store for you in the future, then I see no wrong in believing that someone out there was designed for you. There truly is hope!

If the Lord has freed you from the shackles of your past and you are no longer weighed down by past pains and sorrows, there is much room for hope, even in such a hopeless situation as busted courtships and denied hearts. I guess they could still call hopeless romantics as is, for the lack of a better term, but there is too much hope in Christ to be labeled hopeless.

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